Wednesday, April 7, 2010

April is all about ME...

Yikes yo whoa!

Over hauled the overload!

So I took that momentum and pushed as hard as I could to that unmovable wall. Getting a feeling like that mono log between, Batman & the Joker, but primetime and I'm not dangling 70 stories up by some sort of reinforced cable.

So far April has been stellar...

Picnics!!! It's been soooooo, way to long, since I've gotten to go out and really enjoy some nice weather with good company. Conversation flowing about like the breeze that settles in between our most PG afternoon delight. I feel this bond growing and with that comes panic. Been exhaling a lot lately, been writing more then ever before, and the tension still rests pretty hard on my shoulders. She definitely helps re leave that but replaces it with some intoxicating form of frenzy I'm delighted to let dissect my insides. Tom Petty keeps singing to me, heart is getting a bit harder as apprehension becomes a regular appetizer. Meh! Great friends, amazing times, and laughter that has me cutting back on my crunches :)

Been working back at the ole Jimmy's Grill. I really love my job, truly, and completely. My managers all look out for me, my co-workers are hilarious, and it's truly a safe haven for me. I'm allowed to go into work and be myself. I get paid to do it actually and it helps me sharpen a lot of my skills I plan to continually use through out my life. The best are the tables of kids that come in....I get to mime for them, high fives with em, and this genuinely increases my tip percentage on each bill. It's important to note that it's not why I do what I do but a hilarious bonus. The weather has been touch and go, with cold wins keeping people of our spacious patio. The new blood is looking bleak for the most part. A few peoples that will help the overall effort at the grill but for the most part...YIKES!!! The bosses are right in stride and overall it seems like this is going to be a really great year there. I'm working out the kinks in my schedule so I don't cause to many problems and genuinely feel like I'm not going to be as helpful as years past. I have to really focus on the conference and making sure to take time for myself as well. Over working this machine with all the things I'm trying to accomplish is a recipe for failure FOR SURE...luckily Diana is a wondrous boss willing to work with you where she can.

So I've hit a huge wall in more then a few avenues in my life....


I'm losing way more money then I'm making by doing the booths out at parties. This wouldn't be a terrible thing, except I need to raise money by October, and when I do these booths it takes away from the few free nights I have to rage. So I've come up with a new plan...and it goes...
...If peoples want me to come through and set up the floasis booth, that includes tasty treats for the party, games, and live art I'll be needing 50bucks up front. Then if people want me to drive around, walk around, and promote for their party I'll need another 50 bucks up front. I don't know that anyone will really be willing to pay for either of those services. Seems like the rave scene in Chicago is very much dog eat dog, everyone out for themselves, and an overall lack of Unity. Maybe I'm wrong...but these are the conclusions I've come to over the past 6 months of doing what I'm doing. I came to the conclusion, I can just pick up an extra shift at work and put all that money made towards the conference. NO RISK...ALL REWARD!!!

Then there is her...
...She's the first one in years to get this close to me. Stirs me up in so many amazing and crazy ways. I'm driving miles upon miles, just to pick her up and drive more miles. It's worth it, her smile, and relief (on most meetings) lets me know that I'm some sort of amazing in her life. Were working on this thing called friendship, except, a lot of times I'm left feeling like I'm the only one working at it. Learning to avoid the land mines and put my feeling to the side. I knew the situation before I inserted myself into it but ya know till you get in the thick of it you never really know. So we take lunches when I can swing them. I put her on my lists, take frisbee's to the throat, and a million memories are mashed into an amazing spray of laughter. We hit speed bumps but ultimately I know I've found an amazing friend. Were moving by the ticking of her watch and I really don't have a say in the matter. Leaning on emotions at this point will cause the greatest treasure I've ever found to capsize. So my pride is put on time out and I do my best to speak little during the tense situations. This past month and actually the one before it has been extremely eye opening for me. Really getting an up close look at how I function with someone I have romantic feelings for. All good things in the end either way and I sure am glad when I hear her say..."Hi" but like she does it in this hilarious way...I can't explain it but man!!! sure does make my ears warm.

This month is all about me because it's my born month. Actually as I write this I'm less then a week out from becoming 28. MAN!!! HAHAhHAHAHAhahahaHA Seems like yesterday I was in the thick of turning 26, re adjusting to life post military, and trying so hard to make old friendships work. Now, two years later, a lot of change has taken place in my life and I can't help but think for the better. I feel pretty damn free these days. I create constantly, have an amazing grip of friends, continually working on improving things with my family, an active love interest, a unifying artistic goal, and a genuine smile stitched to my grill through out the day.

I have a pretty nice blow out planned for my birthday. Some great people to share it with and all the time in the world to properly recover from it. Someone recently was telling me I need to take a vacation before the summer starts. I agreed but didn't really know how I could do that. So now the plan is...
Have friends and family over to the lab on Saturday, eat tasty eats, then those that want to come big meet up at Resonate in the city and we DANCE!!! Then I party hard, purposefully, and till check in times at hotels. Grab myself a room somewhere affordable but with a pool and a hot tub. SUNDAY STRAIGHT CHILLEN!!! Then monday, wake up and enjoy my most favorite city, maybe take her out to lunch, but at night were going to Wrigley. Scored 4 tickets to a night game at wrigley on my bday :D Wish my paw was closer but I think I'm going to make a sign and try to say "HI" to him.

As I stated...these posts are a lot shorter, just notes, highlights, and things to remember.

They call it the season of "love" or so I've recently discovered by asking peoples. I call it the season of anticipation, sort of funny, recently it was brought to my attention that I don't like anticipation. :D I don't know if that really sounds like me...Whose got their UGS ticket!!! Hope ya'll are having a safe and fun Spring...High Fives and Hugs...Your beautiful.

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